If you’re an introvert there can be nothing scarier than moving to a new city, with completely new people and be told to ‘make friends.’ On my first day, when my parents dropped me off outside good old Maple Bank, the student helping us carry my things upstairs said “Don’t worry, this is going to be the best year of your life”, and although I’m sure he intended very well, there is so much pressure at University to make your time count – and this I think, kind of spoils the fun. University in films is all about having a huge group of friends, finding the love of your life, and then graduating with a first-class degree before beginning the steady decline of your life. We tend have an attitude that University is the beginning of the end of your life, and if you don’t have the perfect University experience, then you somehow failed. But once you allow yourself to live outside of this pressure, to take yourself out of that forced narrative, then you can really begin to enjoy yourself.
This forced pressure can sometimes mean it feels like you’re not being candid, and that any friendships you make might be quite superficial. I felt a lot of anxiety about this and I don’t think it’s talked about enough, but building your own genuine community is what paves the way for your emotional health at University.
One of the reasons I chose to come to Birmingham was because at the open days, I felt a strong sense of unity within the students, something which other universities failed to offer. The atmosphere was welcoming, and I felt like I could pack up tomorrow to leave home and still be happy. Birmingham is really great at breaking down this forced pressure and helping its students to feel like one big family.
In my first year, although I was very freaked out, I auditioned for the BACAS play and ended up getting one of the lead roles. Although it was only a small play, and I wasn’t doing it with any of the people I first became friends with, it helped to build my confidence because it showed me without a shadow of a doubt, that at University, even though you don’t know people, it doesn’t mean these people don’t want to know you. Everyone was kind and sweet and approachable, and so for any prospective students, or current students who still feel like they are a bit alone, there is nothing I can recommend more than just giving it a go. I know this sounds completely counterproductive and you are probably shouting at your screens “Well DUH, that’s the hard bit!”, but it really is the best advice I can give. Start conversations, join some societies. As soon as you take the pressure off your own shoulders everything will come more naturally.
If you are/applying to be a CAHA student, then you’re in luck. With our new ‘Family Scheme’ which is going to begin at the start of the new year, it will be so much easier to meet new people and hopefully that will bring a lot more confidence to you as you continue at University. Check out our Instagram @caha_uob to follow more updates. If you have any other questions about societies and community in CAHA then you can also message our society Instagram pages @bacasbham and @uobarchsoc.